Better hope that was one lonnnnng exit interview

One employee is being laid off at at this manufacturing plant, and a pilot fish is tasked with disabling the newly-ex-employee's accounts while he's getting the bad news.

"Standard procedure is to call the corporate help desk and request that the account be immediately locked, and then submit a delete request," says fish. "The help desk person has some trouble grasping the nature of the request, but after going over the request several times we've finally got it."

That done, fish responds to a problem call in another employee's office. Some 15 minutes of troubleshooting later, fish heads back to his own desk to look up more information on the issue at hand.

But he can't get into his computer. His account is locked.

Suspecting he knows what has happened, fish calls the help desk. Sure enough, his account has been manually locked. No, the account he called about earlier is not locked.

Fish uses his site contact status to request that his account be unlocked and the correct account locked. The help-desk tech verifies fish's identity, then says he'll work on it.

Twenty minutes later, fish gets a call back from the tech, who says he has to have documented authorization from the site contact in order to make the change. He needs fish to log into the help desk issue tracking software and document his approval in his ticket.

"Which will require me to log into my computer to accomplish," grumbles fish. "It takes several tries to convince him of the futility of his request, but then he's stumped on what he can do next.

"I finally demand that the issue be escalated to a level 2 support person. Once that's done, the new person uses common sense, quickly verifies my identity and promptly unlocks my account."

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