That's silly -- there's no caffeine in Kool-Aid

This programmer pilot fish is responsible for supporting the project planning and source code management tool his very large company uses.

"We spent several months evaluating the best tools on the market and chose one that later became top-rated by one of the big research firms," says fish. "Thus, two years later, I'm thrilled to have led the acquisition and am proud to support it.

"Unfortunately, people think I've drunk the Kool-Aid, and they don't always believe me when I tell them something is not the tool's fault."

Case in point: A new consultant comes on board to help improve the company's software development process, and begins complaining about the tool in short order.

Specifically, the consultant complains to the director about how slow the tool is -- and fish soon gets an email from the director about his expectations for speed. "If the tool cannot meet my expectation, maybe we have the wrong tool," director informs fish.

Fish points out that he suspects limited Wi-Fi bandwidth may be the culprit, something he has commented about before. But the director replies that fish has probably just gotten used to unacceptable performance.

Fish calmly responds that he'd appreciate being called over to a computer next time the software is exhibiting the problem.

And it isn't long before fish gets the call to come to a conference room. It's standing-room-only -- in fact the number of people standing roughly matches the number sitting -- and they're all trying to access the wireless network at the same time.

"I took some screen shots of the network status screen showing terrible wireless throughput and sent them to the director," fish says. "While I was at it, I documented several other things that had nothing to do with the tool that we could fix to speed up the tool's performance.

"Did anything on the list get fixed? No. But the speed complaints have stopped."

Don't stop emailing Sharky true tales of IT life. Send me yours at sharky@computerworld.com. You'll score a sharp Shark shirt if I use it. Add your comments below, and read some great old tales in the Sharkives.

Get your daily dose of out-takes from the IT Theater of the Absurd delivered directly to your Inbox. Subscribe now to the Daily Shark Newsletter.

Join the discussion
Be the first to comment on this article. Our Commenting Policies